What happens when someone falls in love?
Question - Gurudev, what happens when someone falls in love?
Gurudev Sri Sri - After a while, the soap opera begins, you start demanding. When you start demanding, the love diminishes. The joy fades away. So then you say, "Oh I have made a mistake in this relationship." Then there's struggle and pain to get out of that relationship. After getting out of it, you get into one more and the same story repeats. Love is essential in relationships, not mere attraction. In love, there is submission. This is the difference between love and attraction. Though attraction forms the first step, you cannot remain on the first step for too long. You have to move on to the next. That is love. What is that you want to know about relationships? It is really to see how it can be long-lasting. Isn't it? Three things are essential in any relationship :
1. Right perception
2. Right observation
3. Right expression
Often people say nobody understands them. Instead of saying, "No one understands me," you can say that you have not expressed properly. If you speak Russian to a Spanish, they won't understand definitely. Right perception can happen when you see yourself from the shoes of the other person and look at the situation. Right perception, and then right observation. You may have perceived right but how do you react? How do you feel within yourself? Observing your own mind is the second important aspect. This observation within you, observation of sensation, observation of tendencies, observation of patterns within you is also essential. Perception of the other, observation of oneself. and then, right expression. Expressing ourselves in the right manner. if we see from a wider perspective, many aspects will come up: that person is grumpy for some reason. That is reflecting in the relationship, widening our lens of perception. Not just accusing someone for what they did, but rather than accommodating them and seeing them at a larger picture. This will help in the relationship. This is the first secret.
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