What is the root of sex? What do you get in sex? Joy, a thrill, some love, comfort. You know what happens in sex?
Chapter 4 - Real Laughter
Day 10
Question - Do you mean just the observing from some centre is enough, rather than trying to change it?
Gurudev Sri Sri - Yes. The very observation changes it. When you observe, all that is negative falls away. And the nature of positive emotions is - they grow. If you observe when you are angry, the anger will fall away. And if you observe if there is love. love grows.
Question - And the attempt to erase simply strengthens the negative?
Gurudev Sri Sri - Just observing and letting go is the simplest? That is the best and only way. Observe. Observe that thoughts come and they pass. A negative thought comes because of stress.
If you are put under great stress, on that day, or the next day, you will get negative thoughts and become frustrated. All negative thoughts come out of your frustration. Instead of trying to do something with those thoughts that have already arisen, which are of no use, attend to the source from which they bubble up.
If the source is clean, only positive thoughts come. And if negative thoughts come, you observe, so what. They come and they vanish in no time.
Question - Is it true that in India many decisions are based upon astrology? And if so, how can we learn to incorporate more of that in our lives?
Gurudev Sri Sri - I think astrology is everywhere. People everywhere look into the date of birth and month of the sun sign. All the planets affect the intellect and emotions. Beyond that is the Being and they cannot affect the being.
Being is so powerful. It's as powerful as the sun, as powerful as atomic energy. An intention from the level of Being can change the effects of all the stars and planets on our system.
Question - Gurudev, talk to us about the significance of celibacy in our life.
Gurudev Sri Sri - Celibacy is a happening. When your awareness is so deeply rooted in the being and being is permeating everywhere, and when the thrilling joy and love is coming from every pore and cell of your body, a natural phenomenon that you call "celibacy" happens.
The bliss in you is like the peak of the sex experience. When that stays with you as an electric current all the time in your body, you don't feel the body as a physical heavy body. It is light like a flower. It is like space, like air.
When you get very spacey, you don't do anything. You don't feel the body because you are so immersed in joy. Then celibacy happens. It is not a practice that one does. It is a spontaneous happening, when love has flowered so much in our life.
It is one energy which, in the lowest centre of our body, manifests as sex energy as well as creative energy. See, when you are very creative, if you are going for an examination or are involved in a large business, those days thoughts of sex don't cross your mind.
You work, you go to sleep and you work, because that particular activity occupies your mind so much. When you are very creative, the sex energy is transformed. People who are obsessed with sex are less creative.
The one energy comes as either procreative or creative energy. When the energy moves further up, to the second centre of your body, beauty and the arts are enlivened. The same energy turns into arrogance and jealousy.
One energy has these two aspects, either as beauty, arts and appreciation, or as jealousy and arrogance. They are not two different energies. Have you observed our tendency with beauty? We see beauty and we want to possess it.
You may see a nice crystal chandelier and say, "Oh, I want it." You bring it home. Do you enjoy looking at it every day? No. Again when you go out, you see other types of chandeliers which attract your attention.
Most of you have beautiful paintings at home. Do you look at them every day or enjoy them? You seldom do that. You may say you enjoy them, showing them to guests. Do you really enjoy them? No.
Your tendency is - when you see beauty, you want to possess it. In the process of possessing it, you make it ugly. When you see a beautiful boy or a beautiful girl, you want to possess, you want to love them so much that you make it hard for them to breathe.
This is happening. People are suffocated by love. And people are hurt by love. You can't get hurt if there is no love. If you love somebody and they don't smile at you or are busy, you get deeply hurt. You don't get hurt by somebody who you don't love.
Hurt is a part of love. And you don't want to accept that. You just want people to love and say goody-goody things and smile. All these modulations of the mind open up and change with observation.
To me, celibacy is a gift that comes to you. It is a happening. The word celibate means 'married to God'. That means God has possessed you so much, has so fully entered into each cell, that there is no space left for anything else.
Celibate means to be married to the spirit. Having seen over and over again, for life-times, what sex is, you move a step further and become immersed into that, Divinity, that love which is.
Question - You mentioned that celibacy is a happening. If celibacy isn't happening, how can sexuality or sexual union be a part of bringing about the state of being that you're describing? How can that practice enhance that movement?
Gurudev Sri Sri - No practice can bring love in you or beauty. What is the root of sex? What do you get in sex? Joy, a thrill, some love, comfort. You know what happens in sex?
An energy, which is dormant in you, gets opened up. A sensation rises all along your body for a few moments. Every cell of your body is in the present moment so totally. That is joyful. If the joy was just in the body, in the organs, it should remain all the time.
It doesn't remain all the time. Your attraction dies out the moment vour energv escapes or releases trom your body. Now, attending to this energy, this is what real joy is.
Focus on that rather than on an object on the outside. When you see beauty, you want to possess it. Instead, you surrender to it, you love the beauty and you see that the beauty never dies. That becomes gratefulness.
You look at a flower and you feel it with your heart and you surrender to the flower, instead of wanting to possess it. That is the institution of marriage. What is marriage? It is when the husband sees the beauty in the wife and he surrenders to the wife.
He says, "I trust you so fully and I give myself to you." He is not wanting to possess the wife but he says, "Now I am helpless in front of vou, I am nothing. Whatever vou want to do with my lite, vou do. 1 am at your disposal."
And the wife does the same thing to the husband. She says, "I see you as an embodiment of beauty. Now I offer myself to you. I surrender myself to you." Mutual surrender blends into one glow of love, into total understanding.
In day to day affairs, some misunderstandings may come, anger may come, tension comes. All this is a part of life. One may get a little bit hurt, or one may get a little bit angry. Do not make each other feel guilty. If you make anyone feel guilty about any small thing, then you have created an enemy already.
Never make people guilty and, yet, make them understand where the flaw has happened. This is again amourer dit. Sex gives you a glimpse of what the highest possibility of your life energy could be, how you could live in vibrant love every minute.
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